6.12.2009

catching up with something...

Summer has started for me. Josh is home and we are settling into a routine. I ran away for a bit this week. Josh let me check myself into a hotel in Boise for a bit of rehab. Maybe I am weak, but I was beginning to lose it. My family is amazing. However, my brain does not function well spending every day in my house and caring for them. I have no idea what is missing from my girlness, but there is a part of me that has no ability to handle the housewife and stay at home mom thing. Why I am admitting this to the world, I have no idea. I know that some of the people that read this are the perfect women. I envy you. There are people that I know that can sew, cook, clean, and care for their families like nobody's business. I write web comics. My brain must be stuck. Only, it seems to be stuck in the same place as most teen boys. Kind of a strange place to find myself in, but I enjoy it. There is a notebook in my bag full of scripts and storyboards and another one waiting to be filled with the nonsensical poetry that lives in a constant stream in my head. It's like narration. It just flows all of the time and, occasionally, there will be a chunk that should be written down. Only, I suppose it is not like narration in the same instant because most of it has nothing to do with my life... just with life in general.

Okay, now for a little bit of the wickedness living in my head. Sometimes, I just want to mess with people. My computer has a file on it of blogs I have never posted. They aren't posted, because they aren't factual. Some of them sound like they are (okay, most of them do), but they aren't. However, it would be fun to put them up. People are so sure that what they read is what is the truth. It is fun to see how they react when it isn't. It is hard to be a writer. That is why I have two different blogs; one to spout whatever nonsense I want, and this one. There are still people who read my life into my poetry and random whatever. I beg of you, stop trying. If you cannot stop, then keep it to yourself... Otherwise, I am going to have to resort to posting the blogs on my hard drive. It will be like War of the Worlds all over again.

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